Life and Times
GigaOM staff writer and digital media enthusiast. Looks like an urban lumberjack. Likes Eagles football, Phillies baseball, beer, berrs and a dog named Astor. Doesn't sleep enough, has too many iPhone apps. Also, not Jay-Z.
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Video reblogged from BUS YOUR OWN TRAY
I will never get sick of watching this.
So, maybe just take a minute and revel in the pure bleaching juggernaut that is my suburban male whiteness.
You’re welcome.
Ok, so this is of some small significance, and only fitting that it came at the unintentional prompting of Merlin Mann. Here’s what happened.
I was watching TV with the iPad on my lap, as I’m wont to do these days. Correction: I wasn’t really watching the television, it was just kind of on. It was a movie, The Door in the Floor, which was only on because it was on after the last movie I’d been watching, Sherlock Holmes, which I’ve seen a million times but it was the most palatable of things on at that moment and damnit I just wanted the TV on.
With the movie in the background, I’m thumbing through Tumblr on my iPad, and I find Merlin’s post. I have that “I’d like to watch that” impulse. And then a new connection is made in the circuitry of my brain. I have an Apple TV. This is a YouTube video. I can “throw” the video from my iPad to the TV. So I clicked the TV over to the Apple TV input, I pressed play, and then the little AirPlay button. And there, part of a Steely Dan documentary was on my television set.
This was a completely organic impulse. I wasn’t trying too hard to make an over-the-top box stream the Internet to my TV, as I’ve done a hundred times before, forcibly, awkwardly. But this set of circumstances —knowing the TV was on but really reading Tumblr, stumbling upon something that appealed to me, already having the Apple TV set up, knowing how it works— it just all came together as if this is how it’s supposed to be, and then I streamed an Internet video on my television like it ain’t no thing.
I DON’T KNOW WHAT IT MEANS. It was like impulse buying. Instead of flipping channels, something on a parallel system competed for my attention, and I clicked a couple things and boom, Jeff Bridges disappears and Donald Fagen takes his place. All I know is that this is the first time I’ve done this honestly, authentically, naturally.
If the Internet and television are going to converge, we need to know a lot more about user behavior, what with all these new devices and how people actually want them to interact. I had no idea I wanted them to work in this fashion.
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I don’t like to write about work here too much, but this is something that’s been weighing heavily on my mind, so here goes:
I recently decided to stop working with a certain PR firm (which will remain nameless) that I’ve had several problems with over the past few years. I let their clients know that I’d still like to be notified of news, but that they’d have to contact me directly. And one of those clients, whom I have a good rapport with, wanted to know why. I wrote a lengthy email, but this is the basic gist:
I’ve mainly made the decision because after dealing with them for several years on many different clients, I’ve come to the conclusion that “there’s always something” — ie there’s always something that goes wrong in the way news is communicated, or an embargo breaks (when they are aware that the person who does so breaks embargoes) or what was an embargoed story has its time changed at the last minute and someone gets an exclusive.
Whether this is due to mere incompetence or the firm just acting in poor faith, I’m not sure, but the point is that I’m just tired of having to deal with some inevitable screwup every time I get contacted by [them]. Frankly, I just don’t trust them when they come to me with a certain bit of news, or at least, I don’t trust that they will hold up their side of the bargain in making sure that whatever news they’re trying to communicate will be executed on well.It’s not that I don’t like the people there. I actually consider some of them my friends. It’s just that I don’t trust that things will ever run smoothly. So when I’m asked to agree to an embargo, or to speak with one of their clients, there’s always a bit of hesitation, always a question of, “How do I know that this time will be different?”
And frankly, I’m tired of having to ask that question.
I need to trust that the person I’m working with knows not to pitch to the guy (or gal) who always breaks embargoes. I need to trust that the embargo is for real and not a de facto exclusive for someone who’s going to run a half hour early. I need to trust that if I ask for comment or confirmation on a piece of news, I’m not going to be stalled until someone else has the story.
If you’re a PR person or firm, you’re trading in relationships. And if I can’t trust you, I’m not going to work with you.
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Mr. Hump gets everyone’s attention by requesting they end the task they are performing at that time. Mr. Hump then proceeds to take one’s perception of what’s popular and make it no longer appealing. He then goes on to say that despite his comical appearance he is very wealthy, and the planet earth should prepare for his arrival. Mr. Hump invites a group to give their undivided attention as he explains that he has recently moved to the area and he does not make wise decisions. This is of course irrelevant due to his music being produced by his group Digital Underground. He then warns everyone that he will consume all of the cognac that they own. Mr. Hump now decides to introduce himself in a sort of condescending way by removing the initial letter of his first name and then repeating it to the listener. Mr. Hump tells all of the female listeners he would like to perform intercourse with them and issues a request to the current top ten popular rap artists to allow him to be above all of them on the music charts. The listeners should note Mr. Hump seems to be walking on stilts. He then compares the listeners to a popular nursery rhyme where an egg falls from a wall. Pursuing this metaphor, Mr. Hump claims his loud music will cause his listeners to share the same fate with said egg. Mr. Hump then energetically describes some of his favorite things which include: using words that sound alike, his music to have a strange odor emitting from it, and his breakfast oats not to be mixed well. Mr. Hump claims that he is an ill gang member who does very well with members of the opposite sex. Despite all of that, once in a while his absurd behavior causes him to consume all of the listener’s saltines and twizzlers for an undisclosed reason. Mr. Hump then gets the attention of his overweight female listeners by using some offensive phrases. Mr. Hump then points out the fact that even though he is significantly smaller than his overweight listeners he has never had a problem having sexual intercourse with women of their stature. Mr. Hump admits he is a sexual deviant who prefers females with an extremely large posterior, and that he once had intercourse in the restroom of a Burger King. Mr. Hump shares with his listeners that he suffers from some type of mental disorder but will somehow make up for that by leaving his listeners in awe. Despite the fact Mr. Hump is by most standards not a very attractive man he still manages to find himself in situations where women allow him to rummage around in their trousers. Mr. Hump finally reveals to the listeners that he has a dance named after him known as the humpty dance. The audience is now encouraged to perform this dance and observe Mr. Hump perform the dance as well.
Mr. Hump has a very high self-esteem, even though his peers are constantly judging his appearance. Some individuals who oppose Mr. Hump sometimes give him menacing looks and it seems Mr. Hump has a restraining order on said individuals. Mr. Hump exceeds expectations on the dance floor. The females all have strong feelings towards Mr. Hump. Mr. Hump genuinely cares for members of the opposite sex, and proves it by letting them know in advance that his prosthetic nose will stimulate their anus while he performs cunnilingus on a woman who is lying on top of him performing fellatio. Mr. Hump is not embarrassed by his oversized nose, because it has provided him a very good living; instead he compares it to a cucumber that has sat in vinegar for an extended period of time. Mr. Hump wants the listener to know once again he has intercourse with members of the opposite sex. He then compares his social status to the size of his nose which as mentioned before is quite great. Despite the fact Mr. Hump can be quite intoxicated, his archery skills are comparable to a mythological being that makes people fall in love on Valentine’s Day. Mr. Hump informs the listeners’ he uses words that have no meaning and cannot be found in a dictionary. Mr. Hump goes on to confide that he was a performer on the album Doowhutchalike, (pronounced “do what you like”); however, in the event the listener did not by chance hear that album, Mr. Hump had advised his listeners to grasp the flour-and-water mixture that was baked and served during breakfast. Mr. Hump claims he warned the listeners he enjoys using his teeth on them, as well as making use of a pencil and paper, which he feels is self-explanatory. Mr. Hump further informs the listener he will perform the dance named after himself, if the listener will allow it.
Mr. Hump requests that his band mate responsible for bass sound make special notes for him to imitate, which he does presumably to the best of his ability. At this time Mr. Hump takes the opportunity to instruct the listeners on the correct method of performing the dance known as the Humpty Dance. The first thing one would do when performing the dance is move sideways like an individual who has suffered a fractured leg. Next the dancer will move in such a manner that a reasonable person would assume the dancer was burning, but the flames were not present at that time. By this time while Mr. Hump is performing the dance, his peers would tell him he resembled Stanley Burrell freebasing cocaine. Mr. Hump assures them he is doing the dance properly, and it is supposed to resemble an epileptic suffering from a seizure. This activity can be practiced by anybody who so chooses, and Mr. Hump once again reminds the listener the dance is named after him. When performed correctly, two or more people will not perform the dance in a synchronized manner. The dance must give the perception the person performing the dance is clearly not enjoying themselves, possibly even considering a pain remedy. Mr. Hump then encourages the listener to stand up for themselves and continue dancing if by chance a man should confront them with the evidence of an unknown accident that has left that man with only part of his digit.
Just before the song ends Mr. Hump would like to invite all African Americans, Caucasian Americans, Puerto Ricans, and Samoans to perform the Humpty Dance.
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